Thursday, December 11, 2008

Typical Egyptian Male (Part 2)

11. He can't miss a chance to point out a flaw in you. "Isn't it about time you got that lasic operation."
12. He can't miss a chance to blame you. On the way out of a restaurant, he says: “Why didn't you get the bottle of water? I paid for it"
13. Whatever you do, he can't say a word of encouragement. "Oh my god, you paid money for this car!" "You are not doing your post graduate degree at the AUC, why the pain then?"
14. Being chased by a divorcee is a reason to make him proud of himself. "Soso betgry waraya."
15. The news of the same divorcee getting married all of sudden is nothing but a proof that she can't get him off her head. "Law maknetsh Soso fakadet elamal fi makanetsh etgawzet Heshmat."
16. Promises that he made early on, become negotiable by time. "Honey, I think I wouldn't be able to propose at the time being." This convo takes place 6 months after the promised wedding date.
17. If he sneezes, he spends an entire week in bed.
18. He has been a junkie, and a bearded religious man of god, and anything in between.
19. Definitely, when he graduated, he was qualified for a management position. It is only the luck of the competition that got them where they are now. "Tarek abouh kan gayblo wasta keda"
20. He considers obscenity an all-time humour. How many jokes do you hear starting with "Wa lama elmozza...."

Typical Egyptian Male (Part 1)

Typical Egyptian Male (Part 1)

1. He lost all his savings; Stock Market, Rayan, Private Business, you name it.
2. He would rather be with a Russian girl, or any East European nationality for that matter. She wouldn't cost him after he had lost his money.
3. You are not allowed to do what he does. And that ranges from the simple issues of smoking and friends of the opposite sex to losing your virginity before marriage.
4. Your mom sucks and you listen to everything your mom says. Ever wondered who shaped that twisted perception; it his bloody mom.
5. You are fake and you are running after him, and that's why whenever he sees you he talks about nothing except a crush over an East European girl or the "Acclaimed 100, 000 LE" he lost in the stock market.
6. He has no sense of privacy whatsoever. He can browse the files on your mobile even without your approval. If you tell him "What the hell are you doing?" His answer would be "What the hell do you have to hide?"
7. He generalizes. You girls want to marry a rich guy. You girls would make a man miserable. You girls don't wear dresses.
8. He assumes that he is god's gift from heaven to you, and you don't desreve him. Hence he asks you to go over the border for him. "We are going to live with my mom." "I am only 30 Kgs over weight." "My ex loved more than you do and you have to be like her."
9. He sends you SMSs that go like this: "Ana Ga3an". And I envy those girls who manage to resist answering by "ETFA7".
10. He always has a silly excuse; from traffic jam to the silly boss to the money he has to make to please. "Who do I do all that for? I do it for you." So does that mean that he would leave the job if you break up, or that he would work less??

Wait for more....

Part 2

Saturday, December 6, 2008

I'm not even trying

This convo took place between myself and over 7 other people. I can't say enjoy, it is far from being fun.

Friend: Why do you have your personal message as bad mood.
Me: I am in a bad mood, I've been crying all morning
Friend: Anything went wrong?
Me: It has been a year since I left my previous job, during which I had not stopped looking for a job and I am still here
Friend: Work bothers us all, that's why we work
Me: I hate to repeat myself, my boss is a nightmare.
Friend: You chose it dear, live with it.
Me: It is not about the work, it is about having my boss as an example. Her life is a nightmare, she scares me.
Friend: Elaborate dear
Me: The melodrama, the loneliness, living alone. She has that life style and I am afraid of becoming her. I don't want to die alone, I don't want to die before I fall in love and live with the man I love.
Friend: You're still young.. you'll have plenty of time to feel this way when you're older live the moment.. don't spend your life waiting for a moment..
Me: Seeing your worst fears every day, doesn't transform you into an optimist
Friend: You are just stressed. It is PMT! Cheer up :)

The conclusion I reached the following day is: I have no compassion for her and I don't want to. I convinced myself that this is what's going to happen to me and to some of my friends eventually. I have to pretend that this life of loneliness is normal, acceptable and she is just spoiled.