A half hearted apology, that aims at listening to a few blame words then restarting the counter and feeling fresh, leaves me so upset. Don't count on me in giving you the a fake courage of having listened to blame.
You can't tell me you are sorry for being a nasty weird bitch and expect me to let go of the anger I have been bottling up for a few weeks. I am a woman, I can hold on to this anger forever.
If you want to apologise for being weird and claim you are having a hard time, stop being weird so I can listen to you.
And just for the record: No, it wasn't when the time was wrong.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Thursday, February 11, 2010
If you can't say it on FB or MSN, you have your blog
So here I am, doing one of the most irritating things ever. Here you go an annonymous PDA. I miss him but I can't stand the idea of seeing him or talking to him.
I don't like to be taken for granted. I can't handle the feeling of being around a person who is a miser about his emotion.
And let me be honest, people see me always independant, the moment I need support or ask for it they are shocked. As if it is shameful that I am a little weak.
And even if I am asking for support cause I need to be pampered, what is so bad about it.
It is extremely uncomfortable when people are emotionally distant because they are overwhelming themselves with new misery from around the globe. Even worse, they would go the extra mile for anyone but you. You are the strong girl.
I am not strong, you have to occassionally take care of me. I know I used to make my own sandwiches with I was in school. I know I paid for my masters and my car and I know I can handle all the shit. But then don't I desrve a shoulder to lay my head on after all the shit, or in the breaks between every troublesome day and the following one.
I am wondering if people see me as emotionally undeserving or they see me as not in need for emotions. Is everyone I know practically selfish, sissy and gay? Why is it always easier to tell me NO, than to say it to anybody else?
And finally.. I will not admit to you that I have been missing you, because you haven't done anything worthy of being missed.
I don't like to be taken for granted. I can't handle the feeling of being around a person who is a miser about his emotion.
And let me be honest, people see me always independant, the moment I need support or ask for it they are shocked. As if it is shameful that I am a little weak.
And even if I am asking for support cause I need to be pampered, what is so bad about it.
It is extremely uncomfortable when people are emotionally distant because they are overwhelming themselves with new misery from around the globe. Even worse, they would go the extra mile for anyone but you. You are the strong girl.
I am not strong, you have to occassionally take care of me. I know I used to make my own sandwiches with I was in school. I know I paid for my masters and my car and I know I can handle all the shit. But then don't I desrve a shoulder to lay my head on after all the shit, or in the breaks between every troublesome day and the following one.
I am wondering if people see me as emotionally undeserving or they see me as not in need for emotions. Is everyone I know practically selfish, sissy and gay? Why is it always easier to tell me NO, than to say it to anybody else?
And finally.. I will not admit to you that I have been missing you, because you haven't done anything worthy of being missed.
Friday, February 5, 2010
The Wisdom I Learned in 28 Years
No one cares about your back pain, or any other sort ailment you might be going through, except your mother, and your new boyfriend (if you have been in his life for less than a month)
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