Sunday, February 22, 2009

The Blessful Trade-Off

I don't know what I am writing about in this post.

But bare with me and I will try to make myself clear by the end of this post.
It all started with a picture. A picture of an act on the stage of life, where another actress was playing a role I thought would have been mine.
Don't get me wrong. I am not sad at all. I don't care. On the contrary, I am kind of pleased I wasn't.

Sometime ago, I visualized myself in playing that role over and over again. But the day dreaming is now over. And the play was shown but I wasn't there.
The play was shown with its typical actors and audience, only I wasn't there.
On the bright side, I am not sad. I am so pleased.
I know, even though I never confess it, that I share part of the blame of why I am not the one up there.

My heart finds no desire to feel sadness or regret over that role. My heart is busy... busy enjoying how God has blessed me in more than one way with sufficient compensation. God has helped feel no desire for this part in that play. He has mercifully and wisely given me what I needed and taken away what I thought I wanted.

Thank you God! It was a trade-off in my best interest.

I know it is a bit corny but I will finish off with a song. Just don't take it literally.


haijekov said...

With three times mentioning you're not sad you're pleased and going through the effort of writing about it in your blog ba3d tool 3'yaab ... i hope you feel better soon :)

missing your stories btw

Mayo said...

Thanks haijekov for your comment. I sometimes tend to whip myself over opportunities, that I grabbed, those I missed and those I could have dug through the dirt to create... Although at times it feels so good to let go, you know that the what if scenarios going on in your head by the speed of light would never stop until you have a closure... in a form of a bless from god.
I am thankful for the gift :)
Will give you stories, just be patient.

Om HAGAR said...

it is great to feel peaceful with yourself & to be sure that Allah made you the best choice.

please keep this good feelings